The other day I had an interesting chat with a trauma-specialist. I reached out to her after she shared something on her Facebook that really stood out to me as "going against the grain".
You see, she said: "Trauma can be stored in the body. It can also be cognitive."
Now, whilst trauma isn't necessarily something you'd solve with coaching, the same principle applies to areas that can keep a coaching client stuck: it can be because it is stored in the body, it can also be cognitive
Too often in therapies and coaching alike, the tools that the coach or therapist uses to help solve their client's problem is too singular.
Life coaching often only focuses on cognition. And even then it is mostly on the surface level and often ignores the problem altogether.
This is why a lot of people don't get deeply life-changing results.
I've had dozens of people come to me for individual coaching and they've often gone through a lot of different trainings, therapies and coaching already. Without getting lasting results.
After several sessions I often hear them say: "Wow, I've done a lot of work on this already, but we never got this deep." or "I can't believe we never uncovered this in all the other things I've done."
The way I see coaching is that it is more than just helping someone get from A to B by identifying some blocks, doing some reframes and then creating an action plan.
Far too often the client's neurology gets in the way. They ARE stuck in the beliefs they created in the past and carried with them into the present.
So whilst the past is not the problem, the beliefs that were formed there are still driving your client's neurology. And THAT is a problem worth solving before you guide them to the desired state.
The moment your client gets triggered by something, they are stuck doing unwanted behavior. Not because they aren't motivated, but because their state is so intense that they don't feel they have control over it.
If you don't address this, they're not going to be able take the desired action. They may be able to do so for a little while, but going on will power won't last.
If you truly want transformational results for your clients AND you want to help them step in a completely new reality, there are 2 main things that you need to help your clients with:
1. They need to learn how to be in charge of their thinking, feeling, communication and actions. Most people aren't. Their thoughts and feelings are. If your client doesn't feel in charge, it's hard to help them change.
2. You need to help them identify what is holding them stuck in their old way of being. And since the structure of an experience is made up of a somatic response, creating meaning and beliefs through language AND the images and sounds they hold in mind, ANY of these elements can be the "culprit".
By being able to map out their experience and then identifying what distortions are getting in the way, you can create change at the right level. And doing so is what makes change easier for your client.
What that means is that sometimes what needs to be solved are the physical sensations that are triggered in the situation where your client is stuck. At other times it can be the movies they keep playing over and over in their mind. And it could also be that it is the distorted language they are using to interpret a situation.
When you identify this first, you'll know what to change and your client is far better equipped to solidify the change.
When you follow that up with an action plan, you are setting your client up for success. They don't have to fight against their neurology.
To give you an idea of how this works, I'll share the results of one of my clients with you. We've been working together for a couple of months. He has had weight issues and just couldn't stick with his diet.
He knew the diet worked, it was just too hard to follow through.
It turned out that the diet itself wasn't the problem. What was behind this, was a lack of safety. He had been betrayed by others in the past, and those reference experiences were embedded in his mind.
He kept playing them over and over again.
Food was a way of keeping himself safe.
Among other things, we worked on putting those reference experiences in the past and interpreting them in a different way (changing both movie and language to interpret those movies).
We never really focused on his diet. He knew what to do.
Last time we spoke (3 weeks ago) he had lost 8lbs in 2 weeks. Today he said: "Yeah, my diet is going great. It's just my new normal now, I don't even have to think about it."
That's exactly what you want to hear from your client.
And in the meantime, because we solved a much deeper issue than just the diet, he now also feels connected to his purpose and passion in his work, without worrying about what other people will say, do or think about it.
THAT is true freedom.
I teach exactly how to get clients these kinds of results. I teach how you can connect them with their powers of thinking, feeling, communicating and behaving, so it is easier for them to take charge of their change.
And I use a streamlined system to identify WHAT to change, and then HOW to create this change, in a way that breaks down overwhelm and confusion.
If you want to be able to get rock-solid results for your clients, CONSISTENTLY, so you can charge a healthy fee (from a place of integrity) and make a big impact, then let's chat.
I'll share with you exactly how you can start getting transformational results, in under 90 days.